
A gaggle of classic dysfunctional videogame characters rolled up into one big Katamari of crazy? Just imagine a picture of Kefka's face in the box where the check should be. New items, skills, and equipment ripe for the unlocking? Check. An explorable overworld with character-appropriate background music? Check. It's a shame, too, because on paper, the story really looks like something special. You'd think a long, robust story mode would be just the thing to make the combat's flaws less of a bitter pill to swallow, but in Dissidia 012 that's definitely not the case.

is, er, what I would be saying if I read that kind of stuff. Put simply, I've read better crossover fan fiction. As a result, if an attack doesn't land, you get to watch your character practice their nice little dance routine for a couple more seconds, and that's a one-way ticket to Unavoidable Counterattack City, where the weather is always cloudy with a high chance of swords. More damaging, however, is the ebb and flow of combat itself, which focuses on undeniably beautiful animations that tend to take on lives of their own. For one, the camera - Square's arch-nemesis since time immemorial - is easily confused by all the fast-moving action, and it quickly grows tiresome. Some characters can just execute them better than others.Īlso, I always felt a slight-but-irksome disconnect from my avatar, which stemmed from some very fundamental flaws that Square Enix evidently chose to sweep under the rug.

Regardless of which character you're playing, optimal fight tactics are more or less the same. Sure, it looks damn cool - what with all the twirly leaping and enough sparkly special effects to distract people from an entire Michael Bay film - but it's very much an instance of style over substance. Really, though, that mostly serves to highlight combat's central problem: there's not a whole lot to it. This adds another layer of complexity to what's otherwise a fairly straightforward "dash, dodge, dodge, dash, strike" system, so it's much appreciated. Foremost, there's now an Assist system, which allows you to politely request that one of your party members take some time out of their busy schedule of watching and gawking to actually, you know, help for a couple seconds. Rather, it's been tweaked in ways that – though incredibly minute – are mostly for the better. That's not to say combat's completely unchanged, however. Sure, you may be at death's door after getting Aerith-ed ( still too soon?) by good ol' Sephiroth, but if you dodge behind and give him a taste of his own medicine, he might decide to re-think his relentless pursuit and get some bravery back instead.

As a result, battles quickly become frantic games of cat-and-mouse where the tide can turn in the blink of an eye. Bravery points dictate how much damage you can do with an HP attack, so it's best to sap points away from your opponent with bravery before moving in for the kill. That last part, especially, is key because it completely turns the traditional fighting game rhythm on its head. You still duke it out in open, partially destructible arenas, you still dodge and dash about like a zipper-clad Dragon Ball Z character, and you still essentially have two kinds of health bars. I'm mostly happy to report that Dissidia 012 does very little to change that. In fact, the series' particular brand of combat is a refreshing, well-thought-out break from the norm that you can still appreciate even if you don't own a Cloud's sword replica letter opener. Here's the thing, though: the original Dissidia definitely wasn't a simple cash-in, and neither is Dissidia 012. So, a goofy title and a frothing herd of day-one buyers, huh? At this point, you're probably adding new segments to your ten-foot pole so you can more effectively not touch this. In other words, it's a Final Fantasy diehard's dream come true. For those of you prone to fleeing in terror at the sight of words like "duodecim" or logos that read like decrees from Ceasar, here's the gist: Dissidia plucks heroes and villains from all corners of Final Fantasy's past and forces them to square off against one another.
